I've been single for the last nine years. I've been busy raising my boys and working. Now I feel like I am ready to meet someone I feel like I either have to settle for a loser or someone who is 35 plus, but thinks he is still 22. All the men I've considered dating are not work my time. This week, instead of helping people in relationships together, try considering hookin a sistah up?? Love doctor where are all the eligible men in the Bay Area????
- Stef, East Bay

Dear Love Dr. Me and my boyfriend have been dating for a year and two months. Things have been great between us but lately I feel that he is a immature. I feel like I'm constantly babysitting him or making sure that he stays out of trouble or on top of his school work. I'm about to graduate college and I don't think that I could marry him if he continues to act like this. He's proposed before and I told him no because I was only 19 and didn't want to be tied. Should I stay and wait till things get better or should I just leave him alone?
- lost and confused,

Since the kids, wifey says she's no longer "in love" but still loves me. I'm not sure of the difference; perhaps it's the amount of passion one has for their love. I have adjusted so the passion is still strong in me. However, she is content to let the passion, and sex, fade as we live and raise our family. Is just "love" enough for women? Has this become a marriage of convenience now that she has her home, car, kids, lifestyle, etc?
- Good, Strong, Passionate Family Man, The Bay Area

Dear Love Doctor, I have been dating my junior high school sweetheart off and on for 18 years now. He has had two children since then and has gotten me pregnant once with a miscarriage. He recently rented a house and moved his father in--only to keep is baby momma away. His "BM" is my good distant cousin-best friend! My friendship between my cousin & I has been torn apart because of the continuous love that we share. His "BM" has vandalized his truck, and she has approached me to ask me why would I mess w/a man that has 3 kids (1 that's not his). My response was that I had him b4 her & our love will never end. He still let's her and the kids spend the nite from time 2 time to keep the family together. I don't think that she shoud b staying the nIte AT ALL. He has hinted around the word marriage to me several times lately, but he needs to get the "BM" and my cousin to leave us alone & let us have a healthy, unstalked, happy relationship. He's scared of her and her family I think. Is he sticking around because the lovin is too good to leave? What do I do? I LOVE THIS MAN!!!
- STILL IN LOVE 18 YEARS LATER...., OAKLAND

I had a relationship that lasted 3 mo. i quit him because of things I found out of what he's been doing. Whenever, I'm not around him, he talks to other women friends. He talks to a woman who he has dated for 10 years but said that they just talked but can't get back together because they can't work it out. Yet, he talks to her almost everynight. He calls her and visa versa. He talks about me to her and she gives him opinion about me. He text my picture to her and asked what she thought. This made me so angry and upset that I quit him. I called the woman and she got so upset that she called my bf and told him that I called. He called me and got upset and said that he don't have a woman from that point. I said, Fine and hung up. Am I wrong for my actions?
- Love Don't Leave here anymore, SAcramento

Dear Love DR Ive been with this man for 12 years we have 6 kids between us 1 we share the thing is he only satisfies me in bed i met someone that seems to have it all can the grass be greener on the other side?
- DB, Oakland

Getting straight to the point. Been 'married' for almost 22 years to a man that I do not consider my soul mate, friend, confidante, etc... Not looking for anyone else because it is not necessary; just want to enjoy life the way it is meant to be lived; without feeling that my 'voice' does not matter; that is not marriage----- that is a person trying to control someone else, which is basically what he does. Very insecure and nosey. What does one do about this kind of unhealthy situation? Ignoring it is good to a point, but enough is enough. Your thoughts.... Thank you.
- Charmaine, Fairfield

Dear Love Dr., My husband and I have been married 14 years and currently have 4 children. Prior to marriage he and I had an agreement that I would be a stay-at-home mom to our children. That never happened. We both work but I make nearly 4 times more then him. I am now pregnant with twins and I want to stay home this time, he wants me continue working because we need my income. I love and respect him very much and I don't want to be a single mom, what should I do?
- Monica, Tiburon, CA

Dear Love Doctor, I'm having some relationship issues. My man and I have been in a long distance relationship for 4 years now and for the last two he has been talking about marriage in our future, but all it has been is talk. I still have no ring and I'm starting to feel as if I'm wasting my time on this relationship. Do you think it's wrong to date other men on the side? I could be missing out on Mr. Right.
- Ms. Right, Bay Area

Dear Love Doctor I meet this wonderful guy the all the man that I need . It's only one things that concern me about him before we met he had sex with another woman but he been with me every since should I be worried?
- losted in love,

I'm so confused,me and my boyfriend are planning our future,far as starting a family & building a home.We've been together a year now. we truly love each other but he has so many diffrerent personalities....My Question is Should I Build a home or a family with someone who is confused about life? Please Help Me..
- Erica,

Dear Love Dr...Im confused. I've been talking to this guy and when I met him he told me that he was married but it was going SOUR!!!! So that was in November of last year & now he's getting a divorce. I do have strong feelings for him, but I mean he was married and now getting a divorce. He was only married for 3years,but my question to you is do I fall for him or should I just let my feelings fade away. I don't want to be the rebound chick. But what do I do because I do like him a lot!!!! LOVE DR..PLEASE GIVE ME SOME ADVICE,PLEASE!!!!!!
- I'm just so confused!!, Oakland

I've been dating this guy for almost 4 years living with him for 2 years he has 3 children I've met the 2 oldest 22 and 17 for some reason I cant meet the 9 year old??? I also have 3 children they have all stayed with us needless to say I live with him, he says he wants to marry me, he says he wants me in his life forever that he has never been in love like this ??? however I cant go to any family parties as he don't want this child around me? I don't understand how you do want to spend your life with someone you don't want your child around ? I ask why he gives different reasons 1. I don't want the child here because I use to live here with mother 2. I don't want her mother feeling to be hurt ? What about mine ? 3. I think your going to leave me and I don't want her to meet you until I'm sure ?? Its been 4 years... is he still sleeping with this child's mother?
- Whats really going on?, Co-Co County

Love Doctor, I have been dating this woman now for 6 months. We have a great relationship (so I thought), The other day I came home early and when I walked into the bedroom I saw her and a good friend of hers putting on clothes. To my amusement she quickly said Hi Dear and just went on dressing. Her explanation was that she wanted to try on her friends new dress before she went out and bought one for herself. The only part that has me questioning is that her friend was just putting on her underwear at the time. Where should I go from here. I need assistance from the Docs panel of lisetners. Thanks Brett, Redwood City
- Brett,

I recently broke up with my long term bf for 6 years. We're apart for 2 mos. now. I still love him and I want to get back with him. the problem is he has a new gf now...a lot younger than me. I'm really torn apart. I asked him if there is a chance that we could mend things. He rejected. I still want him back in my life, though...HELP!
- Shy,

Dear Love Doctor, I have been (i thought happily) married for the past 27 years. Recently I came across some very erotic e-mails on my home pc between my HUSBAND and a woman he's been claiming as a friend for the past 15 yrs or more. I'm mad as all **ll and disgusted!!! (the woman is fat-mc-nasty. Should I A) Kick his sorry *** to the curb or B) forgive him and keep the party poppin??? or C) go out there with a (male) friend of mine and get even in more erotic ways then one...??!
- digusted & tired of his mess, east bay

Dear Love doctor, I am in love with a man that I have been dating for 4 years now. he is a really great Guy we get along great. Problem is He works two Jobs so doesn't have alot of time to do basic things like Laundry or cook a meal so those things I do for him. I Iron and mend anything that needs to be ironed or mended. I have no problem with it. after 4 years he still says he doesn't know if he loves me. He still refers to me as his friend. I am deeply hurt and don't know if I should continue on like this with him. I have asked this question of him more than once and have recieved the same answer " I don't know" he says he has love for me as a person. As we all know " It Feels so good loving somebody when somebody loves you back" What do I do?
- Candace,

Submit your love problem to the Love Doctor. No more than 10 lines please. Listen to the Love Doctor every Monday morning at 7:50am to see if he can help solve your love problem.